Words are everything

Brain ramblings

I know I haven't posted in more than a month, but I have a legitimate reason.

We don't have internet at my new apartment.

I know. I'm dying, personally. Nick doesn't really care as much. I guess I am addicted! At least I get my daily hit at work, but I can't exactly blog there. Now that I'm at my parents' house, I am getting as much as I can possibly handle! And that means it's time to blog again.

Yesterday I flew in, and the flight was delayed, plus it took us two hours to get back because they closed the entrance to the freeway we usually take, so we had to go the roundabout way home. After that I ate lunch at my fave noodle place, and hung out with Annika for hours while Connie and Mark ate out for their anniversary. The new baby just slept a lot, which is good.

I woke up this morning, and it was 10:50am. I think that is the most I have slept in, in a long time. It felt good. Too bad I won't get to do that the rest of this week, as I'm expected at Connie's at 8am every day! That's even earlier than I arrive at work. Heck, sometimes it's even earlier than when I wake up to go to work!

I was digging through my room last night and I found a lot of old pictures, and also my YSP box. Usually when I find it I go through it and relive what it was like, but I forced myself this time to just put it in a new box. As fun and amazing and transforming that summer was for me, I didn't really need to relive the past, especially concerning Joey. When I let down my guard and wrote happy birthday on his facebook wall or the one time I wrote "how's it going?," (making it only twice total) there was no response on his part, and that's probably a good thing.

I like to think of it as we are moving in opposite directions, and no longer need to be a part of each other's lives anymore. I mean, I saw him once a year for the past four years, and those four visits did more to disrupt my life than that amount of time should have. Of course I don't know how I would react if I accidentally bumped into him, but seriously I don't think that's ever going to happen.

As for Nick and I, we've gotten into this nice comfortable stage in our relationship. I think that we do really live well together and know each other better than anyone else. We have been sort of avoiding the "future talk" but I did find out why he said he didn't want to marry me all those months ago. And, he had a point. But it's not something I can't work through, if we really wanted to make it work. If you want to know, you can personally ask me about it, but I'm not going to display it on my blog.

So then, this makes me restless. My mom keeps hinting to me that she thinks I need to get on with my life and get married and have babies! With Cassidy being born, she says that she hopes she can help me the same way, but that she thinks she'll be too old! I'm like, "Mom, it'll be in the next five years, and you won't be that old." But then she gives me this look. Then I think, well, I have been dating Nick for almost 5 years now...when would we ever be ready? I don't know.

So that's what's been going through my brain lately. Sorry for the lateness! I'll try to update more often during the two weeks I'm at home.

posted by Sharona @ 11:26 AM