Words are everything

Impressions changed

I am sorry that I should have to blog about this, but it's been troubling me. On Thursday I was invited to dinner for one of my close friends, and the turnout consisted of me and Nick, and my friend's roommates and one respective girlfriend. I had just been to Cost Plus to pick out some beer glasses as his birthday present, when I decided on picking out 6 different beers for him to try, ranging from an apricot weizen to a pale ale.

During dinner, I was shocked when he communicated to me that he never drank beer for the taste, but only to get drunk. And, if there were no one with which to drink the beer that I gave him, he would NOT drink them at all. I was hurt because this implied to me that he did not really care for my gift at all, save for the purpose of getting drunk. I had spent about half an hour picking out each beer, even calling one of my other friends for her advice.

The part I look forward to when I give gifts is how they have been received. I try to spend a majority of my time picking something out that I have reason to believe fits the person perfectly...and obviously this was not the case.

He further caused me disbelief when he wondered what the big fuss was about with Michael Vick, as "it was just dogs." I tried to explain how these dogs had been abused, how badly they had suffered, some personally at Vick's hands. He threw off my remarks and replied that they had not even made such a fuss about Kobe Bryant, and he had raped a girl. If I remember correctly, there was a BIG fuss. My friend said, well, Bryant had not lost any endorsements, as Vick had. Yes, that was true, but they never could find any real proof that Kobe had raped this girl, who was found to have other men's semen on her. Vick had funded the entire dogfighting operation, marketed it, and provided a place for it.

Then, even worse, he proceeded to turn it on me, implying that I thought dog abuse was worse than rape. I tried to tell him I was not comparing the two, he was. I was so, so mad; it was all I could do not to stand up and leave right then and there. I couldn't believe he was treating me this way at a dinner for his birthday. I mean, I had spent my time and money on a gift, and here we are at a restaurant I hate, because he picked it. I went there willingly, to spend money on food and also treat part of his meal.

I feel now, that some of my original anger was probably exaggerated, due to the situation. But some of it still is there, and I don't know if I can ever look on him the same way again. He used to be one of my favorite people, one who I could always count on for amusing conversation and easy companionship. But now, I'm not so sure.

...
p.s. Forgive my formal writing style, I have been reading a trilogy that parallels Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, and its language is still in my head.

posted by Sharona @ 12:23 AM